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2 years ago
Took you a while
We all get what we can, which isn't that great for most (unlike me i love my girlfriend) but dating is a hellscape of toxic behavior for a lot of people and here are some examples:
"Dating today is like navigating a minefield... but instead of mines, it's filled with commitment-phobes and ghosters. Who needs explosions when you can have emotional implosions?"
"In the current dating world, finding 'the one' feels more like trying to find Waldo in a sea of Tinder profiles. Who needs a needle in a haystack when you can have a pixelated face in a sea of selfies?"
"Dating apps have turned courtship into a shopping spree... swipe left, swipe right, and hope you don't end up with buyer's remorse. Who needs a soulmate when you can have a coupon for a one-night stand?"
"Modern dating is like a twisted game of musical chairs... except the music never stops, and there's always one less chair than there are players. Who needs romance when you can have a competitive sport?"
"Dating today is like being a contestant on a never-ending reality show... constantly auditioning for love, only to be voted off the island without warning. Who needs roses when you can have rejection?"
"Dating today is like navigating a minefield... but instead of mines, it's filled with commitment-phobes and ghosters. Who needs explosions when you can have emotional implosions?"
"In the current dating world, finding 'the one' feels more like trying to find Waldo in a sea of Tinder profiles. Who needs a needle in a haystack when you can have a pixelated face in a sea of selfies?"
"Dating apps have turned courtship into a shopping spree... swipe left, swipe right, and hope you don't end up with buyer's remorse. Who needs a soulmate when you can have a coupon for a one-night stand?"
"Modern dating is like a twisted game of musical chairs... except the music never stops, and there's always one less chair than there are players. Who needs romance when you can have a competitive sport?"
"Dating today is like being a contestant on a never-ending reality show... constantly auditioning for love, only to be voted off the island without warning. Who needs roses when you can have rejection?"
2 years ago
We're finally here
70% of onlyfans accounts make under 100$ just dropping this out there. You would get bullied if kids find out your mom has an OnlyFans , here's a few reasons why:
"The Subscription Sabotage": "Because suddenly, your classmates are less interested in trading Pokémon cards and more interested in discussing your mom's latest subscription rates. It's like having a front-row seat to the weirdest reality show ever, and unfortunately, you're the star."
"The PTA Paradox": "Because while other kids' moms are busy organizing bake sales and chaperoning field trips, your mom's calendar is filled with photoshoots and live streams. It's like being the only kid at school whose mom moonlights as an accidental influencer."
"The Family Feud Fiasco": "Because nothing says 'bully bait' like having to defend your mom's choice of career during a heated game of dodgeball. Suddenly, insults are flying faster than dodgeballs, and you're left wondering if you should have just stayed home and played video games instead."
"The Social Media Sideshow": "Because thanks to your mom's newfound fame, your social media feeds are filled with more thirst traps and sponsored posts than a Kardashian's Instagram. It's like living in a constant state of secondhand embarrassment, with your mom as the unwitting star."
"The Career Day Catastrophe": "Because while other kids' parents are talking about their 'boring' jobs like doctors and lawyers, your mom's presentation on 'the art of the selfie' is met with a mix of awe and awkward silence. Suddenly, you're the kid with the coolest mom and the biggest target on your back."
"The Subscription Sabotage": "Because suddenly, your classmates are less interested in trading Pokémon cards and more interested in discussing your mom's latest subscription rates. It's like having a front-row seat to the weirdest reality show ever, and unfortunately, you're the star."
"The PTA Paradox": "Because while other kids' moms are busy organizing bake sales and chaperoning field trips, your mom's calendar is filled with photoshoots and live streams. It's like being the only kid at school whose mom moonlights as an accidental influencer."
"The Family Feud Fiasco": "Because nothing says 'bully bait' like having to defend your mom's choice of career during a heated game of dodgeball. Suddenly, insults are flying faster than dodgeballs, and you're left wondering if you should have just stayed home and played video games instead."
"The Social Media Sideshow": "Because thanks to your mom's newfound fame, your social media feeds are filled with more thirst traps and sponsored posts than a Kardashian's Instagram. It's like living in a constant state of secondhand embarrassment, with your mom as the unwitting star."
"The Career Day Catastrophe": "Because while other kids' parents are talking about their 'boring' jobs like doctors and lawyers, your mom's presentation on 'the art of the selfie' is met with a mix of awe and awkward silence. Suddenly, you're the kid with the coolest mom and the biggest target on your back."
2 years ago
No regrets
Buffy was a good show and she looked like how the average high school-er SHOULD look. You were ugly and Buffy was hot and here's a few reasons why:
"The Awkward Adolescent Antics": "Let's face it, high school was like a bad episode of 'Saved by the Bell' for me—I was more Screech than Zack Morris. While Buffy was slaying vampires and saving the world, I was trying to navigate the treacherous waters of puberty without sinking like the Titanic."
"The Teenage Transformation Tragedy": "While Buffy was rocking leather jackets and kicking butt, I was stuck in a perpetual state of awkwardness that even a vampire couldn't glamor away. Let's just say my 'glow up' was more like a 'slow crawl out of the awkward abyss.'"
"The Braces and Bad Hair Blues": "While Buffy was busy staking hearts and breaking hearts, I was busy trying to hide my metal mouth and frizzy hair under a hoodie like a low-budget superhero. Let's just say I wasn't exactly giving off Slayer vibes in the hallways."
"The Prom Dress Disaster": "While Buffy was slaying at prom in a killer dress, I was slaying my chances of ever being prom queen with a dress that looked like it was made by a blindfolded toddler. Let's just say my fashion sense was more 'fashion faux pas' than 'fashionista.'"
"The Buffy vs. The Buffoon": "Let's be real, comparing myself to Buffy is like comparing a soggy Cheerio to a stake-wielding superhero. While she was saving the world from apocalypses and bad hair days, I was just trying to survive homeroom without tripping over my own feet. It's no wonder she looked better than me—she had better lighting, better makeup, and way better fight scenes."
"The Awkward Adolescent Antics": "Let's face it, high school was like a bad episode of 'Saved by the Bell' for me—I was more Screech than Zack Morris. While Buffy was slaying vampires and saving the world, I was trying to navigate the treacherous waters of puberty without sinking like the Titanic."
"The Teenage Transformation Tragedy": "While Buffy was rocking leather jackets and kicking butt, I was stuck in a perpetual state of awkwardness that even a vampire couldn't glamor away. Let's just say my 'glow up' was more like a 'slow crawl out of the awkward abyss.'"
"The Braces and Bad Hair Blues": "While Buffy was busy staking hearts and breaking hearts, I was busy trying to hide my metal mouth and frizzy hair under a hoodie like a low-budget superhero. Let's just say I wasn't exactly giving off Slayer vibes in the hallways."
"The Prom Dress Disaster": "While Buffy was slaying at prom in a killer dress, I was slaying my chances of ever being prom queen with a dress that looked like it was made by a blindfolded toddler. Let's just say my fashion sense was more 'fashion faux pas' than 'fashionista.'"
"The Buffy vs. The Buffoon": "Let's be real, comparing myself to Buffy is like comparing a soggy Cheerio to a stake-wielding superhero. While she was saving the world from apocalypses and bad hair days, I was just trying to survive homeroom without tripping over my own feet. It's no wonder she looked better than me—she had better lighting, better makeup, and way better fight scenes."
2 years ago
2 years ago
2 years ago
Drinking is fun though
Or so i'm told memes are my escapism of choice
Many regrettable things can happen when you get shitfaced such as
The "Urgent Urge":
You underestimate your bladder's rebellion after too many drinks and embark on a frantic quest for a restroom, realizing too late that it's already too little, too late.
The "Projectile Protest":
Attempting a discreet vomit session, you find yourself in the wrong spot, spraying your surroundings with an unexpected technicolor yawn.
The "Toilet Tango":
Misjudging the distance, you perform a splashdown maneuver, turning your bathroom into a splashy scene from a water park.
The "Barstool Surprise":
Seeking refuge on a barstool, you discover too late it's already occupied – by your own vomit.
The "Ink Incident":
An uncontrollable laugh leads to an unexpected vomit stream, transforming your night into a messy masterpiece.
Many regrettable things can happen when you get shitfaced such as
The "Urgent Urge":
You underestimate your bladder's rebellion after too many drinks and embark on a frantic quest for a restroom, realizing too late that it's already too little, too late.
The "Projectile Protest":
Attempting a discreet vomit session, you find yourself in the wrong spot, spraying your surroundings with an unexpected technicolor yawn.
The "Toilet Tango":
Misjudging the distance, you perform a splashdown maneuver, turning your bathroom into a splashy scene from a water park.
The "Barstool Surprise":
Seeking refuge on a barstool, you discover too late it's already occupied – by your own vomit.
The "Ink Incident":
An uncontrollable laugh leads to an unexpected vomit stream, transforming your night into a messy masterpiece.
2 years ago
