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2 years ago
Dogshit a classic present
A tier lower then coal. We thought about this one long and hard! She was probably saying it out of the goodness of her heart! Dog Shit is wonderful! It's the gift that keeps on giving and here is why:
"Because nothing says 'I love you' like a gift that keeps on giving... fertilizer for the soul, straight from Fido's behind!"
"Forget the fancy wrapping paper, nothing says 'holiday cheer' quite like a steaming pile of doggie delight under the tree!"
"Who needs socks or ties when you can give your cousin the gift of a surprise scavenger hunt? It's like Christmas morning, but with a twist!"
"They say it's the thought that counts, so why not give your cousin a thoughtful reminder to watch their step? It's the gift that keeps on giving, long after the holidays are over!"
"In a world of material possessions, give the gift of humility. Nothing humbles you faster than accidentally stepping in a 'present' from man's best friend!"
"Because nothing says 'I love you' like a gift that keeps on giving... fertilizer for the soul, straight from Fido's behind!"
"Forget the fancy wrapping paper, nothing says 'holiday cheer' quite like a steaming pile of doggie delight under the tree!"
"Who needs socks or ties when you can give your cousin the gift of a surprise scavenger hunt? It's like Christmas morning, but with a twist!"
"They say it's the thought that counts, so why not give your cousin a thoughtful reminder to watch their step? It's the gift that keeps on giving, long after the holidays are over!"
"In a world of material possessions, give the gift of humility. Nothing humbles you faster than accidentally stepping in a 'present' from man's best friend!"
2 years ago
2 years ago
2 years ago
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2 years ago
Roleplaying Faux Pas
There is no right person for this message. Anime sexual role play is cringe. Here's some reasons why:
The Subtitle Struggle: "Because trying to dirty talk in Japanese sounds less like seduction and more like a poorly dubbed anime—nothing ruins the mood faster than accidentally asking for a bowl of ramen mid-coitus."
The Tentacle Tangle: "Because anime sexual role play always seems to involve tentacles—sorry, but I draw the line at cephalopod-themed foreplay. I'm not trying to reenact a sushi buffet, thank you very much."
The Cosplay Catastrophe: "Because trying to look sexy in a full-body Pikachu costume is like trying to seduce someone while wearing a mascot uniform—sure, it's cute at first, but it's hard to maintain the illusion of 'sexy' when you're sweating profusely inside a foam suit."
The Overdramatic Dialogue: "Because anime sexual role play often involves way too much dramatic monologuing—nothing kills the mood faster than your partner reciting a soliloquy about the power of friendship mid-coitus. Can we stick to dirty talk that doesn't require subtitles, please?"
The Uncomfortable Sound Effects: "Because anime sexual role play is always accompanied by exaggerated sound effects—sorry, but I draw the line at pretending that every orgasm sounds like a squeaky toy being stepped on. It's just not realistic."
The Subtitle Struggle: "Because trying to dirty talk in Japanese sounds less like seduction and more like a poorly dubbed anime—nothing ruins the mood faster than accidentally asking for a bowl of ramen mid-coitus."
The Tentacle Tangle: "Because anime sexual role play always seems to involve tentacles—sorry, but I draw the line at cephalopod-themed foreplay. I'm not trying to reenact a sushi buffet, thank you very much."
The Cosplay Catastrophe: "Because trying to look sexy in a full-body Pikachu costume is like trying to seduce someone while wearing a mascot uniform—sure, it's cute at first, but it's hard to maintain the illusion of 'sexy' when you're sweating profusely inside a foam suit."
The Overdramatic Dialogue: "Because anime sexual role play often involves way too much dramatic monologuing—nothing kills the mood faster than your partner reciting a soliloquy about the power of friendship mid-coitus. Can we stick to dirty talk that doesn't require subtitles, please?"
The Uncomfortable Sound Effects: "Because anime sexual role play is always accompanied by exaggerated sound effects—sorry, but I draw the line at pretending that every orgasm sounds like a squeaky toy being stepped on. It's just not realistic."
2 years ago
Voicing a cats opinion
What are they hiding in there?
More subtle cat written (POSSIBLY) home improvement ideas!
"Home Makeover Magic: Add cozy nooks and sunny spots to your space, creating havens for relaxation and exploration. Who knows, maybe someone with whiskers will appreciate the effort!
"Bathroom Bliss: Locate the litter box in a tranquil corner, ensuring peace and privacy for all restroom visitors. It's like creating a zen retreat for a certain someone in your household!
"Serenity Spaces: Designate quiet zones for unwinding and contemplation, offering a retreat from the hustle and bustle of daily life. It's all about fostering a sense of tranquility for everyone in the household.
"Playtime Paradise: Incorporate fun activities and toys into your daily routine, encouraging laughter and bonding moments. You never know who might appreciate the extra playtime!
"Safety First, Fun Second: Remove potential hazards and declutter your space to create a safe environment for everyone. It's like giving your home a makeover, with added peace of mind!"
More subtle cat written (POSSIBLY) home improvement ideas!
"Home Makeover Magic: Add cozy nooks and sunny spots to your space, creating havens for relaxation and exploration. Who knows, maybe someone with whiskers will appreciate the effort!
"Bathroom Bliss: Locate the litter box in a tranquil corner, ensuring peace and privacy for all restroom visitors. It's like creating a zen retreat for a certain someone in your household!
"Serenity Spaces: Designate quiet zones for unwinding and contemplation, offering a retreat from the hustle and bustle of daily life. It's all about fostering a sense of tranquility for everyone in the household.
"Playtime Paradise: Incorporate fun activities and toys into your daily routine, encouraging laughter and bonding moments. You never know who might appreciate the extra playtime!
"Safety First, Fun Second: Remove potential hazards and declutter your space to create a safe environment for everyone. It's like giving your home a makeover, with added peace of mind!"
